Muted Passion
by That Endless Mania
Summary: AU. It didn't matter that she would abandon him. It didn't matter that, in the end, she would still break him into two. :Ulquihime, super belated birthday fic for abilityPOINT::slight changes made:


**30/12/09**

**Made a few changes in the fic. AP didn't like Momo's part, and since this is a giftfic to her and she's the boss, I suppose it'll be right for me to change it for her 3; (im awesome like that)**

**Oh and, the category's changed from M to T. I suppose the parts aren't gory enough to limit it to eighteen years olds and above *coughs***

* * *

Okay, this is one of the longest oneshots I've ever done (and will ever do). One of my betas asked me if I wanted to separate it into chunks and develop the storyline further but I was all "NO, I MUST WRITE AN IMPRESSIVELY LONG (for my pathetic puny standards) ONESHOT EVEN IF IT KILLS ME" so here you go. Luckily I seem to have not descended to the afterlife (yet).

**This story is dedicated to abilityPOINT, because she somehow always manages to sit through all my shit. And still come back for more. ILY, sweetums. :D Super uber belated birthday fic, and happy 14.**

**Ah, and this story's mainly in Orihime's POV, sometimes jumping to narrative. So don't come to me and "EH WTFZ, I DONT UNDERSTAND THE STORY", because I will smack you. Hard. Oh, and it's AU. In some long ago era in Japan, whatever. **

**Viva la vida!**

* * *

_Because you live,  
My world  
Has twice as many stars in the sky_

_In the end, no human being is without his own selfishness._

* * *

Nine summers back, I was seven.

It was a sunny day, one of those days where you feel great, where you know that the world's out there for _you_ and there's always gold at the end of the rainbows. Even so, I felt incredibly lonely. Aizen-sama had restricted me to my room (as always, I could only ever go out when there were visitors around), which was a perfect waste of good weather, in my opinion. But of course I didn't tell Aizen-sama that. My opinion never counts, the only thing I ever had a say in was whether I could have rose petals in my bath or not, or if I felt like eating steamed buns for lunch instead of egg noodles.

So there I was, in the room and gazing through the windows that looked out to the persimmon gardens. Gin Ichimaru, Aizen-sama's scary right hand man, loved persimmons, so there was an entire acre of land in Aizen-sama's mansion( also known as _the_ Hueco Mundo) that was dedicated to growing it.

I sighed.

It was incredibly boring, to sit in your room the twenty four hours a day, seven days a week, four weeks a month and twelve months a year. For your entire life to be restricted within a rectangular hole in your wall (otherwise known as your window). But I knew better than to complain, becaus Aizen-sama was my sole benefactor, the uncle who saved me after my parents and my brothers died of a strange, contagious illness two years back. I could hardly remember them anymore, time had fuzzed my memories. I had asked Aizen-sama about them once, _did my mum and dad love me? How did they look like? Did brother, like me, used to like sour plums too? _

Aizen-sama had merely sneered at me, and walked away. I never got an answer, only a lesson: never ask Aizen-sama about my past again.

Footsteps; I peered out of my window, eagar to see who it was. Usually it was Gin tending to his trees, and if it _were_ Gin, I would immediately shuffle to the corner of my room after hurriedly drawing the curtains. But it wasn't Gin; the footsteps were somehow lighter, and less draggy. My curiosity was instantly aroused, as it was rare for anyone else besides Gin to visit the persimmon plants.

A boy. A young boy. My age, maybe older than me by a year or two. He was picking the persimmons, with his skinny back turned to me.

'Hey,' I called out.

The boy was startled, for he jumped and immediately turned to me. _His eyes_, I thought with wonder. His eyes was a beautiful emerald, an enrapturing green, even more sparkling than Aizen-sama's jade necklace. He was a scrawny thing, with skin so pale I was afraid that he'd soon fade away. 'Hey,' I attempted say again. 'Are you working here?'

The boy was quiet for a moment. Then he nodded.

_Must be a son of one of the servants_, I thought as I yelled, 'what's your name? I'm Orihime. Orihime Inuoe.'

The boy opened his mouth, then hesitantly snapped it shut. 'Come on,' I cooed. 'I won't tell Aizen-sama that I spoke to you.' Another boy! Of my age! That was one of the most wonderous things that ever happened to me for a long time.

The boy relaxed visibly. 'I'm Ulquiorra. Ulquiorra...Ciffer.'

'Are you plucking persimmons?' I asked the obvious. But I was determined not to let this chance, this solitary chance to interact with another human being go to waste.

He nodded. It occured to me that this conversation was leading to nowhere. Ulquiorra and I had no common topic - the quiet servant and the imprisoned princess - and it seemed to me that his only replies (if any) only came in either vague body gestures or monosyllables, none of which contributed to a lively conversation that could breed bosom buddies. But I was not about to be crushed. Looking at him, I asked, 'can you come and talk with me?'

For a moment he looked startled. I should have known, at that time, that I was being rather cruel, asking Ulquiorra to do impossible tasks, knowing all the while that he was obliged as a servant to obey my every command. To my surprise, he composed his shocked face and slowly, with his basket half-filled with persimmons, advanced towards me. He stopped within a metre of the window, gazing at me with those unfaltering eyes, a deep green hue, patiently waiting for me to initiate conversation.

As I stared into those brilliant, brilliant eyes I found myself unable to speak. After a brief period of silence I hastily asked, 'who're your parents?'

'I'm an orphan.' His face was deviod of emotions.

'Me too.' I suddenly felt much closer to this lone, odd boy. Surprise momentarily flickered in those electric green eyes.

'Hey,' I said, in an attempt to relive the sudden tension. 'Can you come close?'

In an instance, Ulquiorra tensed, giving off the aura of an extremely discomfited individual, and I had a sudden fear of him dropping the basket of fruits and make a mad dash for the hills. Hastily, I added, 'I don't bite, you know.'

Ulquiorra relaxed visibly, then came to face me. I pointed to the basket of persimmons, orangey-red in colour, giving off a sweet smell. 'Can I have one?'

Ulquiorra hesitated for a moment, before nodding once. Elated, my hands swiftly dove into the basket and dug out one persimmon. 'Wait...' began Ulquiorra, but the fruit was already halfway towards my mouth. I had prepared myself for a huge, savoury bite of sweet, juicy flesh, but as I clamped my jaws shut a most astringent, puckering taste of unripe fruit quickly filled my mouth.

'Yuck!' I spat the half-chewed morsel out of my mouth. 'It's disgusting!'

Ulquiorra frowned slightly. 'I'm sorry, I wanted to warn you...'

'It's okay,' I said hastily, proceeding to throw the persimmon out of the window. 'No!' cried Ulquiorra, as he dove nimbly and caught the half eaten fruit before it could land onto the ground.

I was incredulous. 'You want to eat it?'

Ulquiorra shook his head. 'There are more uses to the persimmon than being eaten as a fruit.' He spoke slowly, as if he was unaccustomed to talk at faster speeds. 'Folklore has it that the cross-section of a seed of the persimmon fruit can be used to predict the intensity of the upcoming winter.' **[1]**

I was amazed. 'Really?'

Ulquiorra nodded. He pried open the half-ripe fruit and extracted a seed, then took out a small pocket knife and sliced it apart. The shape of the seed's interior resembled a knife.

'We're going to have a harsh winter,' he said, frowning. I nodded, pretending to share in his worry. Harsh or not, winters were all the same to me: I would spend it in my room (as with all the other seasons) only that there would be a fireplace to keep me warm.

A sudden idea struck me.

'Hey, Ulquiorra, help me get out of this room.'

Ulquiorra looked at me as if I had suddenly instructed him to reconstruct the great wall of China using carrot sticks only.

He shook his head vigorously. 'No, I can't...'

'Please,' I begged, grabbing his hands and holding it. He didn't pull away, but merely continued to shake his head in utmost horror. 'No...'

'Then I'll crawl out of the window myself, and if I fall and break my neck and become crippled for life because you didn't want to help me, it will be your fault.' The trick worked neatly. Resigned to fate, Ulquiorra squatted down in front of the window his back faced to me. 'You can fall onto my back,' he said. Pleased, I crawled onto the window and over it, landing neatly on Ulquiorra's back and resulting in us being tangled into a crumpled heap. I was the first to stand up, and I extended a hand to him. He caught it and I pulled him up.

I gazed around.

So this was what the garden looked like, from the outside. I laughed, pleased, and gave Ulquiorra a hug. 'Thank you,' I breathed excitedly. He was surprised for a moment. Then slowly, he grinned back.

We played amongst the persimmon trees the entire afternoon, hide-and-seek and catching, imagination being our dictator. Time passed by in a flash. The sun was setting, but I was reluctant to return to my room. I looked at Ulquiorra, who was very much transformed from the somber boy he was, acting more like an eight-year-old, carefree child he was supposed to be. His porcelain face was flushed a faint scarlet with the excitement of the afternoon.

'I got to go back,' I mumbled, hating the words that I was saying. He looked solemn, but nodded. I smiled reluctantly, and promised him. 'The next time we're here together again, we're going to play to our heart's content.'

Ulquiorra nodded, and spoke softly. 'Yeah... the next time.'

There was no next time.

* * *

'You allowed for Orihime to escape from her room?'

Ulquiorra and I were in Aizen-sama's study. Aizen-sama was sitting on the chair, while Ulquiorra and I stood tamely in front of him. Tosen, Aizen-sama's left hand man, who had caught us in our little adventure in the garden a few while ago, was standing impassively beside Aizen.

'I made him do it...' I began, but Aizen-sama stared down at me with his unblinking, hard eyes, silencing me.

'You will only respond when talked to, foolish girl. You have already disgraced yourself today,' he spat, voice as cold as ice. Something about his poisonous tone, the cruel twist of his face caused me to stop abruptly in mid-sentence. Beside me, Ulquiorra responded. 'Yes. It was me. I helped her escape from her room.'

'Very well,' said Aizen. 'Orihime, I will let you go, just this time. I do not expect you to partake in such a foolish task the next time. Do you hear?'

'Yes,' I replied, very much humbled, and even more amazed that I paid so light a penalty for so heavy an offence.

'You'd better. Tosen,' summoned Aizen-sama. Tosen stood forward. 'Bring Orihime back to her room. She is not to eat for the next two days as a punishment for what she has done.' Momo nodded. 'As you wish, Aizen-sama,' Tosen said, and took me roughly by my shoulders, leading me out of Aizen-sama's study.

Halfway to my bed chambers it suddenly dawned upon me that I still did not know what punishment was to befall Ulquiorra, so I asked Tosen.

'He is a servant, and has committed a great offence,' said Tosen, slowly. I did not think of playing with me upon my own orders was a 'great offence' on Ulquiorra's part, but I kept silent, willing for Tosen to go on. He did not speak.

'...So what's going to happen to him?'

Tosen tensed. 'It is not anything you should be concerned of.'

But it was, and I told Tosen that. When she did not cave in, I proceeded to plead her, then to beg, cry, wail, and roll on the floor hysterically. One party had to give in, and eventually Tosen did. So he told me of Ulquiorra's punishment.

I screamed. I was still screaming and crying when I reached my bed chambers.

* * *

For many years later, Ulquiorra and I never discussed what happened to him on that day. Even after he became my personal attendant many years later, Aizen's punishment still remained a subject unsaid between the two of us. Partly because he could never speak again; but mainly because we both knew that, on that day, as Aizen had slowly cut off Ulquiorra's tongue, he had already forgiven me.

But I never forgave myself.

* * *

True to Ulquiorra's words, a harsh snowstorm hit Hueco Mundo that very winter.

* * *

**Back to present day.**

I was awake even before dawn broke.

I lay on my four poster bed, hugging the silk sheets. My fine, thick mane of hair spilled onto the pillow. Many have complimented my beautiful hair, the dazzling shade of orange-brown. I hated it. In fact, I had a secret wish to shave myself bald one day, walk around the town naked in a fishing net and scare away all my suitors Aizen had picked for me. That would be the day.

Which reminded me. I felt beneath my pillow and produced a single note.

_Let's elope. Next Monday, dusk. Outside the persimmon patches of Hueco Mundo. I'll wait for you. Kurosaki._

I stared at it. My go-ahead to freedom. _I'll wait for you._ The handwriting was large and scrawly, Kurosaki's. A man I'd met a few years back, the son of a merchant who often made deals with Aizen. _The_ man I knew that I could never live without. A tiny grin played along my lips, the lips that had ceased smiling a long long time ago.

Footsteps; I quickly shoved the note into the deep cresses of my robe, which had to be the lamest hiding place on earth. My heartbeat quickened, then I heard three soft taps on the door.

I relaxed. It was him.

'Come in, Ulquiorra,' I called out softly.

* * *

Ulquiorra's eyes - the brilliant green that still manages to bedazzle me, after all these years - widened slightly, but his face showed no emotions. No surprise, or shock. I supposed he had seen it coming. A certain heaviness lingered in the air as my plan to elope had finally been unveiled.

'I need your help to smuggle me out at dusk. Outside the persimmon gardens. Kurosaki will bring me away from there. I've already packed my essentials in a bag, beneath this bed. But there's the final hurdle I need to cross, and I will need your help,' I told him. 'Ulquiorra... for one last time, will you help me?'

We both knew the answer, even before he spoke.

* * *

Outside the door, Nnoitra smiled, removed his ears from the door, and walked away.

* * *

It was dusk. Ulquiorra pushed a hefty wooden box on a gigantic wheelbarrow, making his way out of the main house. 'Hey,' yelled Yammy, who was on guard duty that day, at the side gate. 'Where'd you think you are going?!'

When Ulquiorra remained silent, he laughed harshly. 'Eh, I forgot you're a fucking mute now.'

Striding towards Ulquiorra, he flung open the lid...

...revealing bales of silk.

'Goods outta town?' he spat at Ulquiorra, who nodded once.

'Okay,' he said. 'You're clear, now fuck off.' Wordlessly, Ulquiorra replaced the lid of the wooden box and walked out of the gate.

* * *

At the dinner table, Aizen glanced at the empty seat beside him.

'Does anyone have any idea what happened to Orihime?'

Nnoitra, who had been standing next to Aizen, said, 'She has plans to elope.'

* * *

I crawled out of the secret component of the wooden box.

'Thanks a lot, Ulquiorra,' I smiled. 'Now, we've to wait for Kurosaki to arrive.'

* * *

'Oh?' said Aizen.

* * *

'...Hey, Ulquiorra?' I turned to Ulquiorra, who was standing beside the wheelbarrow. His eyes flickered to me.

'Thank you. Thanks a lot.' I smiled, looking at him straight into the eye. Our gaze met, and it held there for the next few seconds. 'It's been hard on us, huh, for the past few years... on you, especially.'

His gaze met mine. _I'll manage._

'And...' I wanted to apologize to him, for being responsible for him becoming a mute, for abandoning him now, even though he had been by my side all along. But the words stuck in my throat, refusing to come out, cruelly compromising Ulquiorra of what he had rightly deserved, all this while.

Then my heart stopped beating for a moment, because I saw Aizen slowly making his way out of the main house.

* * *

It was ulquiorra that regained his senses first, grabbing me and my belonging simultaneously and pulling me into a run. Not _to_ anywhere, but _from _the man who had scarred us, physically and psychologically for the past sixteen years. The wind whipped against my face as I looked all around for Kurosaki. Where was he? He had promised me to be here by dusk.

Then I saw him. On his brown horse, Zetsuga, galloping towards us.

'Kurosaki!' I cried, waving towards him. I tripped halfway, and Ulquiorra caught me in time before I fell. Zetsuga came to a screeching halt before us.

'Orihime,' he said.

'Aizen's on the way,' I panted. 'We've to hurry!'

With Kurosaki and Ulquiorra's help, I hoisted myself onto the horse, sitting in front of Kurosaki, my belongings on my lap. I turned to Ulquiorra.

'Thank you,' I said, reaching my hand out.

He hesitated, and did likewise, as our gaze met for one last time, our fingertips brushing against each other.

And then I was gone.

* * *

Ulquiorra turned his eyes to the persimmon gardens.

_The next time we're here together again..._

Ulquiorra closed his eyes.

* * *

**Five years later**

'Ulquiorra?' The butcher's wife laughed as she handed the package of meat to me. 'Your kid is cute, but he has a really weird name. Did your husband choose it?'

'I did,' I replied, paying for the goods.

I took the meat and held Ulquiorra's hand. He looked up at me: my child, my own child with my brown eyes and his father's bright orange hair.

'Mummy,' said Ulquiorra. 'The lady there says I have a weird name.'

I looked at Ulquiorra. Then I smiled, stooping down to kiss his forehead. 'No, I think that the name is just fine.'

* * *

**I suppose you guys know what happened in the end. Orihime and Ichigo led a happily ever after life, and for that Ulquiorra paid his life as the price. Sorry bubs, such is the way of ****life.**

**I'm sorry if it didn't bring out the level of, uh, maturity expected. But hello. I've just turned 15 (yesterday). **

**[1] It's true. Credits to wiki. Aren't they all?**


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